Tow

Code 3 for seizure.

Cops tell us they were going to tow this car because the driver has a suspended license. Good for them; around here it seems like half the drivers don’t have valid licenses. The driver’s girlfriend or whoever starts freaking out about having to walk a few blocks home, and says she feels like she’s going to have a seizure. She probably thinks if she creates some sort of dramatic scene the car won’t get towed.

Of course she’s wrong, because there’s nobody to stop the car from getting towed once she’s on her way to the hospital for her so-called impending phantom seizure. Also, she fails to realize that nobody on this scene besides her friend give a crap about her. Not that the cops were going to just let this one go anyway, especially now that she’s wasted everyone’s time. Thank heaven she wises up and saves us from having to actually to take her to the hospital.

The officer apologizes to us for wasting our time.

“Not a problem. We’re here specifically for people to waste our time with their horseshit. We wouldn’t have anything to do otherwise.”

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