Code 2 for the cold. Literally, that’s what it says – the “cold.” In the dead of night, of course. And it’s cold outside.
A 23-year-old male at a voluntary psychiatric board-and-care facility is sitting in the office, bundled up in his hooded sweatshirt, complaining of having a “cold” and “not feeling good.” A staff member is nearby.
“Do you have anyone you can call to take you instead?” My partner asks, hoping the staff member standing right there would catch his drift for the next time someone wants an ambulance for something this dumb.
“You think he’ll come and pick you up?”
“I think so. But I want to take the ambulance.”
“Fine. I’m just saying – next time, call him first.”
We’re still holding out hope that the staff member heard this exchange – and remembers it for the rest of his life. The patient gets pissed though.
“Man, this is the worst cold ever!”
“Yeah, and this is the worst call ever.”