One night, with a total of 6 cops and 6 of us, as we’re restraining a very combative drunk 20-year-old female to a backboard in the backyard of a home belonging to a large family who has absolutely no idea who she is…

“Hey, I like your flashlight. Which one is it?”

“Oh, it’s the Stinger DS LED.”


“Dammit, stop moving!”

“That’s a good one. I got the Strion myself. Love it. Small enough for pockets.”


“She’s trying to bite.”

“Cool. The button on my power switch fell off, but otherwise it’s great.”

“HEY! No spitting!”

“Fuck you, asshole!”

“Where’s that spit hood?”

“Sit on her legs!”

“Yeah, some of these flashlights are really good these days, especially the LED ones.”

“You got her?”

6 thoughts on “Flashlights”

  1. Ahhh…I love call jargon!
    Anyone not in the field would think we were complete assholes but it is all good!!!!!! It’s really sad that not everyone can truly experience and appreciate the skill that is involved in carrying on these conversations while at the same time trying to pry the lighter out of a naked man’s mouth!

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