“I broke both my legs!”

Code 2 for leg injury.

A fit-looking male is supine on the ground next to his car in the driveway, writhing in pain.

“I think I broke my legs!”

“Um… both?”

“Yeah! They hurt real bad!”

I can see that they plainly aren’t broken. I feel around. I touch patients.

“So what were you doing?”

“I was lifting weights at the gym. I drove home and couldn’t get out of the car.”

“Heavy weights?”

“Pretty heavy.”

“Leg workouts?”

“Yeah.”

“You work out regularly?”

“Yeah. Help me!”

I bend his legs at the knees and push hard, stretching his quads. He screams. Loud. People on the street turn to stare.

And then he quiets down after 7 seconds.

“Oh! The pain is better now!”

“You had cramps, dude.”

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